6 of the Worst Marriage Clichés/Sayings


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In just a few short months, Husband and I will be coming up on four years of marriage. Now, I know that’s not a SUPER long time, but we’ve already outlived a number of Hollywood marriages, and that has to say something, right? Ours is not the perfect marriage, as no one’s is, but every day, I learn a thing, or two, that helps us grow.

One thing that I’ve learned is that there are multiple clichés/sayings, out there, that are meant to be helpful and amusing, when it comes to marriage. The reality of it is that they are actually obnoxious and sometimes arrogant, and they should never be followed/encouraged.

Don’t go to bed angry; stay up and fight. I’m sorry, but there are times when you actually should go to bed angry. When it’s nearing midnight, you’re both tired, and you’ve been running around in circles, arguing about basically nothing for the last 45 minutes, you need to know when to call it quits. From my experience, nothing good ever comes from staying up and arguing; it just makes things worse. If the issue absolutely needs resolved, get a good night’s sleep, and revisit it the next day, when your eyes are no longer glazed over.

Start each day with a clean slate. This one goes hand-in-hand with the above cliché. If there are still things that need hashed out, the slate isn’t exactly clean. A more appropriate version of this saying would be, “Start each day with a clear head.” Don’t just ignore things and hope that they go away. I promise they’ll come back up later, with a vengeance.

However, once peace has been made with an issue, don’t keep bringing it up during later arguments.

You and your spouse should have similar hobbies. I mean, if you and your husband happen to meet in the middle on some things, that’s awesome. You should definitely have hobbies that you like doing together, but differences are what keep things exciting! Definitely have interests that are your very own.

More important than having the same hobbies, know when to take one for the team and do something with your spouse that you don’t absolutely love doing, just for the sake of doing it together. Caleb doesn’t adore wandering around Forever 21 with me, just like I’m not usually dying to go to gun/Army surplus stores with him. Sacrifices, man. Sacrifices.

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Marriage is just fancy word to adopt an over-grown male child, who is no longer handled by his parents. Any variation of the dumb husband or nagging wife quotes drive me insane. For my hometown friends, who know what The Varsity Grille is, there’s nothing like walking into the ladies’ room and seeing quotes like, “Marriage is the only war where you’re sleeping with the enemy,” among other brilliant marriage-related quotes, plastered on the wall.

Sayings that degrade marriage and the people in it aren’t helping anyone. Of course, it’s important to have a sense of humor, but not at the expense of your spouse. In the words of Taylor Swift, “Why ya gotta be so mean?”

Honey-do lists. No. Nope. Forget it. If I walked in, and my husband had hand-written a list of all the shit that I needed to accomplish around the house/errands that needed to be run, that would probably be one of those nights when I’d have to go to bed angry. I am not a child. I do not need to be told what to do by my husband, and I’m sure it’s equally annoying when a man comes home to a honey-do list on the counter, signed with a lipstick print.

Instead of the honey-do list, just ask your spouse (nicely) to fix the leaky faucet, take out the trash, or whatever it is that needs done to help lighten your load.

Any reference to the ol’ ball-and-chain. Does it really make anyone feel good to be referred to as an item that was used to restrain prisoners? Especially in reference to marriage? Just think about that for a second.

Can all of these things just go away? Pretty, please?

Obviously, I’m no marriage counselor; these are just some things I’ve noticed. Every marriage is different, and we’re all doing our best, so if you’ve found what works, even if it is a silly cliché, just keep doing what you’re doing.

Are there any marriage quotes, pieces of advice, or sayings that you’re tired of hearing? I’d love to read your thoughts!



My Journey Through Yoga


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^ And sometimes, you fall. And that’s cool, too. ^

Ours is a very fitness-conscious household. Okay, let me rephrase that – my husband is a very fitness-conscious man. (Ya know – with the Army, and all.) When you’re married to someone who becomes lethargic and bummed out when he misses a day or two of working out, you tend to think a little bit about yourself. Surprisingly, it is difficult to indulge on Oreos, while your hubby is out at the gym.

For awhile, I would go with Caleb, and we would do workouts together. He would help my with postures, spot me when the weights were getting a little out of my control, and give me constructive criticism, as well as plenty of positive feedback. I always felt good walking out of the gym, but, like any normal person in the world, I didn’t love walking in. And I sure as hell wasn’t going to go out of my way to go there when Caleb was working, which is, you know, always.

So, I needed an alternative.

One day, I locked eyes with my yoga mat (let’s pretend, for a moment, that yoga mats even have eyes), that had gone unused for far too long. I decided to pick it back up, again, and, if it killed me, I was going to stick with it this time. And so far, I have. And it’s been life-changing.

I love challenging my body to do things I never, in my life, thought it was capable of. I look forward to stepping on the mat and just being with myself and my breath, trying new poses, feeling my arms shake when they’re working hard and my muscles stretch. I love looking in the mirror and actually seeing results and feeling poses get a tiny bit easier each day.

What I love the most about yoga, though, is that it’s all about inner peace. When you have a head like mine that’s constantly going and thinking, it’s refreshing to work on your mind while you also work on your body. When those thoughts pop into my head, reminding me of all the stuff I still need to get done that day, yoga is a time when I am doing exactly what I need to be doing at that very second, and everything else gets put on hold. Yoga is a time to clean out the clutter.

Honestly, yoga branches out into just about every aspect of life. This journey has also made me a little more mindful of what I eat, encouraged me to drink more water and tea, and even to get my temper in check. When something irritates me throughout the day, because I can be an extremely irritable person, it makes a world of difference just to stop, take a few deep breaths, and reach for that calm that I find on the mat.

I am beyond thankful that I’ve found something fitness-related that I can be passionate about, and I’m excited to continue practicing and growing. Even if my poses aren’t perfect at first, someday they will be (hopefully!), and until then, I can be proud that I’m taking a bit of time every day to just work on me, inside and out.

If you are thinking about practicing, just DO it! Do what you can, and enjoy yourself. It’s all about the journey, and I promise it will be worth it.

I also can’t want until this Savannah heat calms down a little, so I can begin my outdoor running routine, again! Come on, fall! Where are you?



To the Future Military Wife, There Are Some Things You Should Know


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You should know that this is not a scene out of Casablanca (1942) or Dear John (2010). This is the real deal. If you’re one of those people who hops onto social media to complain when your boyfriend goes away for a couple of days, this is going to be tough for you. (Actually, it’s going to be tough, either way.) We’re talking missed holidays and important events, training cycles when your husband is gone days at a time, schools for which he’s gone weeks at a time, and deployments when it’s months at a time.

We’re talking potentially moving away from family and all you’ve ever known. You will probably have more strains on your marriage than the average civilian couple. You will eat many of your dinners solo. You might just want to get a dog, because the two of you will spend more time together than you and your husband.

If you’re like me, and dread the thought of going through pregnancy alone, trying to plan for children is a laughable, disheartening matter, because there will never be a time when your husband is consistently there. Planning vacations is going to be a challenge. Actually, planning anything, ever, throughout your entire military marriage is going to be hard. The military makes the person you’re supposed to rely on more than anyone, the most unreliable person in your life.

There are a million things that are not ideal about the military lifestyle. I, and any other spouse, could go on and on about what pisses us off, but to the future military wife, your challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to make the impossible possible.

When you’re alone for months at a time, you need to have your own thing going on. You need a job, hobby, or to volunteer your time, because taking the time to focus on you is often the most important. You cannot let the Army (or whichever branch you are on your way to belonging to) BE your life. When that happens, you get those stereotypical, gossipy, bored military spouses, who live vicariously through their husbands, and that’s not good for anyone. In the midst of taking care of your hubs-to-be, don’t forget to take care of yourself.

If you want kids, you must remember that not everything can be planned (as mentioned previously). This is something that I’m still learning myself. I always joke with my husband that I’m basically going to be a single parent, whenever that time comes for us, because he’s never around. I’m always trying to think of a time when things will be calmer before we embark on that journey, and I’m really working on accepting that that time is never going to come. And when we do welcome one or two more to our family, and my husband happens to be leaving soon or is already gone, I’ll be strong. And so will you, in a similar situation.

Each of the examples I initially listed are inconvenient, frustrating, and, frankly, annoying, but none of them can break you, as long as you don’t let them. Every hurdle will be matched with a new experience and new memories that you will carry with you forever, so it’s basically the old win some, lose some saying. That’s just the way it goes.

And if you do enter into that military marriage, remember how you feel, right now. Remember the uncertainty and concerns you may have about such a drastic lifestyle change, and keep that in your back pocket. Then, when you’re a “seasoned” military spouse, and you see a new girlfriend or wife start hanging around your group of friends, reach into that back pocket and reminisce in those feelings for a moment. Then, I want you to make that new member feel welcome.

Don’t ignore or snub her. Don’t put yourself up on a pedestal and look down upon the new girl in town. Don’t speak to everyone in the group, but her. Befriend her, because let me tell you, it’s terrifying walking into a house party full of fellow military wives, for the first time, and feeling like fresh meat. It’s important to be warm and approachable.

No one is going to judge you if you decide that this isn’t for you. You should be thinking about the challenges, but if you can just accept that these trials are not the end of the world, and that your military marriage will probably not be some storybook romance, you’re going to be fine. And at the end of it all, you’ll be a much stronger woman. The things that you have the capability to overcome will truly surprise you.


A Small Update


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Above are a few photos that I snapped at the Savannah Wildlife Refuge a couple of weeks ago. I should have uploaded them sooner, but if I’m being honest, reading Game of Thrones has sort of owned my life, lately, so almost everything else has been put on the back burner.

We had such a lovely afternoon together at the Wildlife Refuge, despite the fact that it was around 96 degrees (I’m not even exaggerating), we had lots of fun just being together and searching for alligators. We saw a bunch that day, big and small, creeping around in the water, and there was a nice breeze every once in awhile, so I’ll chalk that up as a success. We explored routes that were a little off-the-beaten-path, and even had a lunch of the always delicious MRE! Ha!

At the end of our journey, Hubs got this girl to a Starbucks, because while I love nature and hiking, I’m also a city girl and enjoy the small luxuries of life, like an overpriced iced-latte.

As for more current news, I’ve still been working at Graveface Records, which I love. They are currently preparing for a huge release, so it’s been busy, busy, and I really enjoy being a part of the hustle and bustle! Caleb has also been working his tail off, as usual, and has recently returned to me after graduating from Jump Master. He is forever making me proud, and I love being here to celebrate those big moments with him.

My hope is to begin devoting more time to Fancy That. I’ve said that plenty of times before, I’m sure, but circumstances have recently changed, and I’ll have more time and energy to commit to my personal blog posts. I’ve been so absent from this site that I totally neglected that FT celebrated its fourth birthday on the fifth. Four years is a good chunk of time, and I love having so many fond memories in one place. Here’s to four more years!

I’ll be back soon.


More Savannah Adventures


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I was extremely fortunate to have my parents and my sweet cousin join me in Savannah for a bit over a week. I was over-the-moon ecstatic to have them here and to show them around this city that I now call home, especially since Husband has been away for a few weeks. It gets awfully lonely around here without him, so I was thankful for the laughter and love that filled our apartment while they were here.

As you can see by the plethora of pictures, we kept pretty busy. Our days were spent beaching it up, trying local cuisine, visiting downtown landmarks, shopping at the mall, exploring Bonaventure Cemetery, and searching for alligators at The Savannah National Wildlife Refuge, to name a few, while during the evenings, we played Uno, made dinner, enjoyed some adult beverages (those of us old enough, of course), and binge-watched Pretty Little Liars, at the request of my cousin.

Even Capone was happy for the extra companions and took a special liking to Murry, insisting that he come up on the couch and snuggle with the two of us each night. (Shh – don’t tell Caleb!)

I really hope everyone had a good time. Honestly, I can’t believe that they’re all back in Ohio, already. It seemed like their visit was over in the blink of an eye, and when I walked back into a silent apartment, it really set in how much I enjoyed and appreciated having them here.

This Savannah move has been the greatest joy. I’ve met new people, discovered new favorite local spots, interned at a record store that I’m head-over-heels in love with and that has the potential to offer a real career opportunity, and most importantly, I’m here with Caleb. This lifestyle change has been full of fun and adventure, but there’s always a space in my heart that feels empty with my family and hometown friends being so far away. I often feel like I’m missing out on the important things, back home, so when I’m able to reconnect with the ones I love, after not seeing them for awhile, I feel whole, again. I love being able to pick up right where we left off.

This past week, or so, has felt like a dream. I loved going to sleep at night, knowing they were all just on the other side of the wall and waking up to the smell of Dad cooking bacon and making coffee. I loved hanging out with Murissa, who is basically the sister I never had, and having a full table with tons of yummy food. It means so much that they all came down, and yesterday, I had to work through some “empty nest” sort of feelings. I just wish I could pick up everyone I love and move them here, with me! A girl can dream, can’t she?


Fourth of July Weekend


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There’s really nothing in the world better than family, the beach, and my precious little bulldog. The husband and I took a little drive to Hilton Head this weekend, where we stayed with my in-laws for a couple of days. We visited the beach the first day, catching glimpses of dolphins and collecting seashells. Caleb and I brought our snorkeling stuff along to no avail – there was zero visibility in the water. We knew ahead of time that it was going to be tough, but we thought that we would at least see SOMETHING. Regardless, we got some practice in in the actual ocean, rather than just our pool, so I’ll chalk that up as a success.

Even Capone played on the beach some! We let him off his leash, and it was the best watching him jump and frolic through the waves. Despite the fact that he can’t stand baths, he’s certainly a beach dog! He was so tuckered out, by the time we got back to the truck, that he fell asleep almost immediately and remained that way the whole way back to Savannah.

We also spent our time reading by the pool, working on our tans, and exploring the local shops. Naturally, I located a candy store and came away with a cream soda, a praline (because you can’t live in the south and not adore the deliciousness that is the praline) and, of course, sour gummies. A girl needs to spoil herself with sweets every once in awhile, ya know?

Of course, we also watched the fireworks over the river! What Fourth of July would be complete, without them? I’m so thankful that my husband took one for the team and watched them with me. He’s not a huge fan of crowds, so getting him out of the house and around all of those people is kind of a big deal. He’s the best, and they were beautiful. Celebrations are my favorite!

I definitely can’t write a blog post about this weekend without mentioning my grandfather-in-law’s delicious meals! Every time Caleb and I visit, he spoils us with the yummiest food and cocktails. This time, the menu consisted of, but was not limited to, brisket, bacon-wrapped hot dogs, salmon, twice-baked potatoes, Long Island Iced Teas, Bloody Marys, and margaritas. Caleb  jokes that when we leave HHI, he needs a very long nap, because he’s fed so well at his grandparent’s, and we are definitely not complaining.

On our way home yesterday, we got caught in a storm, which was lovely. I love a good southern storm, and while the rain pounded down around us, I read a few more pages of Game of Thrones, which I have FINALLY committed to reading, after all this time. I’m really enjoying it, so far, and am excited to find out what happens to all of the characters. All 2,399 of them.

Anyway, that’s the scoop! I hope everyone else had the best Fourth of July weekend. I’ll be back soon!


Happiness Is…


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Happiness is walking out of our front door, first thing in the morning, to the smell of freshly-cut grass. It’s an excited bulldog running out to greet the world, his little toosh wagging. It’s a fresh cup of loose-leaf Earl Grey tea, with just a tad too much sugar and watching a southern, summer storm roll in. Bliss is a healthy husband, a glass of wine while preparing dinner, and scoring a bundle of new-to-me vinyl at secondhand stores. It’s potential new career opportunities and freelance writing. It’s sharing in friends’ happiness and adventures, surprise gifts from beloved family members, and stacks of peanut butter toast, because it reminds me of Dad.

It’s a bag of my favorite snack (Jones Salt and Vinegar chips, anyone?) that can only be purchased in Ohio, vintage aprons, snapping photos, and taking care of our little home. It’s being excited for the future and visits from Mom and Dad and beginning new books and discovering new places. It’s being stoked about life and never giving up, regardless how many rejection letters I receive.

Happiness is being a good wife, a good friend, a good daughter, a good bulldog mom, and an all-around good person, to the best of my abilities, and looking forward to each new day. It’s recognizing my mistakes, apologizing for them, meaning it, and using them to better myself. It’s also in recognizing my flaws and not apologizing for them, because they make me me. It’s binge-watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians, and not apologizing for that, either. It’s setting goals, starting projects, visiting local produce stands, and looking forward to holidays. It’s the sound of my husband’s key in the door at the end of the day, and it’s his freeze pop wrappers all over the coffee table, and sometimes the floor, because as much as it drives me nuts, it means he’s around.

Happiness is every day life, in every breath I take. It’s recognizing that I can’t please everyone, and I’ll never be perfect at anything, but as long as I’m at peace in my heart, I’m doing okay.


Road Trippin’


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This past weekend, Caleb and I traveled to Ohio for a family member’s wedding. The ceremony and reception were absolutely gorgeous, and we were so thankful to be able to spend time with family. We adore Savannah, but living 12 hours away is challenging, at times, when our loved ones are so far away. My parents even made a trip to visit us on Friday, and we spent the afternoon browsing the local shops, eating at the Dublin Pub, and taking in the historic residential area in Dayton. There was some crazy weather, so I didn’t bring my camera along for this excursion, for fear of it getting soaked in a downpour. Despite the fact that I have no photos from the afternoon, I had the greatest time hanging out with them, and it was so cool of them to drive the two and a half hours to meet us!

The next day, before wedding time, we went to the National Museum of the United States Air Force, where Caleb’s great uncle has a couple of items on display from his early Air Force Days. Caleb was like a kid in a candy store checking out all of the airplanes, helicopters, and weapons that were on display.

This weekend went so incredibly fast, but we took advantage of every moment that we spent in Ohio. Though the drive back was kind of a nightmare, it was completely worth it just to catch up with my parents, in-laws, and to see our sweet cousin walk down the aisle. (By the way – her wedding was book-themed. BOOKS! AND WE WERE SEATED AT THE GREAT GATSBY TABLE, WHICH IS MY FAVORITE IN THE WORLD! It was too perfect.) Even Capone tagged along with us and made some new dog friends!

As for today, I whipped up some homemade bread and soup, and Caleb and I have just been recuperating, after driving until almost 3:00AM. Tomorrow he goes back to work, and I begin an exciting internship, so we’re both pretty stoked that we had a day of quiet before every day life begins, again. There’s a summer storm rolling in, so I might just pour a glass of wine, grab my book, and watch the rain come down.


Sunday Bloody Sunday


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Whoa! I’m so sorry for that little hiatus, guys. Inspiration struck again, though, when Caleb and I went out on the town this afternoon. We had a nice lunch at Six Pence Pub, hit up the candy store to stock up on sour ribbons, and visited Boars Head Grill and Tavern for a Bloody Mary. What a lovely way to spend the day, especially since I had my husband by my side. He’s had a busy couple of weeks, so I’m thrilled to have had a few relaxing days together.

After exploring Savannah, for the millionth time, we headed home and washed our cars, which Capone was not too sure about. All that splashing water isn’t really up his alley.

I was also happy to catch up with my dad today for Father’s Day. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without his guidance. It never slips my mind how fortunate I am to have grown up with such supportive, level-headed, responsible parents. Someday, I’ll have my own children, and I hope to be even half the parent they are.

So, that’s what’s been up, readers! I’ll be back soon.


6 Things Every Bride-to-Be Needs On Her Registry


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So, you’ve just been proposed to (or done the proposing!). Now, what? There’s choosing a venue, ordering flowers, picking out the perfect dress, and, of course, the bridal registry. Now, I know how tempting it is to take those bar code scanners and zap everything you come in contact with. OF COURSE, you need twelve table settings of fine china and two strawberry core removers. WHY THE HECK WOULD YOU NOT NEED THOSE THINGS? I myself spent hours in Crate and Barrel and Williams-Sonoma, picking out every other thing in the store. While I’m not here to take that fun experience away from any bride, I have to say that it’s easy to get a little carried away.

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In the midst of all of the fluff, there are practical things that, of course, will make newlywed life so much easier. I’ve chosen half a dozen of my favorite kitchen items to share with you. I decided which things I use the most, and that would be beneficial for every couple. I am forever in the kitchen, cooking and baking up a storm, and there are certain items that I’m just so darn happy to have on hand.

1. A Large Cutting Board – I had a few cutting boards before my parents bought me this monster for Christmas. I always struggled with chopping my fruits and veggies, which I do constantly, because the food would fly all over. I just didn’t have enough room, so this extra large board has been an answer to my prayers.

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2. Storage Containers – These Glasslock containers are my favorite in the world. I love that they have the snap-on lids, keeping leftovers and produce extra fresh, don’t leak, and are super durable. Yes, they’re glass, but I’ve dropped them plenty of times, and they’re still intact. There are only two of us, so I’m always over-estimating how much food to prepare. I love having nice containers to fall back on, when I’ve made too much.

3. Casserole Dish – I use this dish more than I could possibly explain to you. We eat a lot of soups and casseroles around here, because they’re simple, cost efficient, and they’re meals that can stretch. A casserole dish is a definite must-have for all newlyweds.

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4. Mixing Bowls – The possibilities for mixing bowls are endless. Of course, they’re beneficial for baking, but I also use them for ingredient prep, mixing scrambled eggs, and as serving dishes. They’re just good to have sitting around.

5. Crock-Pot – This has been an absolute godsend. When you don’t feel like slaving over a full-course meal at dinner time, throw all of your ingredients into a Crock-Pot, and let it cook for a few hours. There are tons of Crock-Pot recipes out there, and my favorite one to make is Chicken Taco Chili. Trust me, having one of these makes life so much easier.

6. Lots of Utensils – Everything from spatulas to ladles to tongs, you’re going to need a bunch of utensils. What I use the most are my wooden spoons, which is why I’m forever buying more. Wooden spoons for life!

Have fun during this exciting time of your life, and while you’re registering for all kinds of cool stuff, but don’t forget to add things that make sense to stock your kitchen with.



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